Image“There are two types of mints you never turn down in life: breath mints and compliments. Either way, someone is trying to tell you something.”  

It has always been hard for me to accept a compliment.  Why is that?  Is it because I don’t want someone to think I think that I am all that and a bar of soap?  Actually, with a Black-Belt in Co-Dependency, I have discovered that I don’t want people to “not like me,”  so even if I think the compliment is true in my own mind, I don’t want to appear haughty.   I have also learned over the years in the School of Hard Knocks that many times when people want something from you they say something nice about you –  to you – in hopes of getting something from you.    

When I became a Chamber of Commerce Executive, I had a lot of “new best friends.”  I realized that not everyone was really sincere, so I started keeping a Compliment Journal to help me discern whether or not the compliment(s) given me were authentic or not; I looked the journal over every 5 or 6 weeks.   My thought process was that if I found a similar compliment made several times by people who did not know each other, that it probably had some merit.  

After keeping the Compliment Journal for about a year, I resolved that when given a compliment, rather than diminishing it so that I did not appear haughty, that I would graciously accept the compliment – true or not – and say “Thank you.”  I revere sincere, honest compliments and since we have all given both sincere and insincere compliments, if we are aware, we can recognize which one is being given us.  

 Bottom Line:  I learned some things about myself and about others – now read the quote at the top again.  

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. beckypublisher
    Jun 17, 2012 @ 00:16:27

    Amen, girlfriend! That’s why one of my favorite philosophies is that Truth Counts — I can handle anything as long as I know it’s the Truth. And good friends speak ONLY the truth with each other. It promotes trust and understanding, and helps to deepen the love.


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